Sunday, March 7, 2010

Alio's Tweet Talk - MARCH 2010

TRAVEL ETIQUETTE by alex o'halloran

Is there such a thing as travel etiquette?

On a recent trip to Sydney, my sister and I resembled two red eyed racoons as we sat gulping down a strong coffee in the departure lounge at Avalon. We noticed that some travellers' bad etiquette habits were on show well before we'd even left the ground as we watched an impatient man 'bang on' rudely, complaining that his has brown wasn't warm enough.....yes there's always one!
Like us - everyone appeared half asleep at 5am, rubbing their eyes, yawning and maybe hoping to hell they wouldn't see someone they knew at such a ridiculous hour........because when you look like crap - you ALWAYS do!
Whilst some people have manners when travelling or flying, others leave them on the ground.Have you ever sat down in your plane seat and dreaded what idot might sit next to you?
Typically you might encounter.........
THE RAPID RECLINER: This traveller is the one who immediately pushes the button to fling the seat back as far as it can go before the plane has even left the tarmac. They never consider their back seat neighbour.
THE TALKING TERRIER: For some travellers, flying is the perfect opportunity for 'solo time'. The biggest airline crime is the 'terry talk a lot' neighbour who won't shut up! The only way to avoid this is to immediately grab a mag or a headset - which instantly says 'back off chatterbox - I'm not recruiting mates on this flight' sounds cruel - but sometimes it's just gotta be done.
ARM REST HOGS: Don't you hate them? With only 2 inches of arm rest space between you and your neighbour, remember the simple rule. It's 50/50. If they insist on hogging - gently nudge, smile and re-claim your 50% back. If that doesn't work, wait until they go to the loo and re-claim 100%!
TIGHT ASS FLYER: The ones that complain about everything when they've paid a mere $30 for a ticket. My flighty friend always had the perfect answer for them. "You pay a bus get a bus ride", what else can they say?
THE BOOZER: The freaks with the mini wine bottle obsession. Content with their very own little bar on board and if that's not enough, they buzz the trolley dolly to get a few more.....just in case.
THE AISLE MASTER: The compulsive aisle nut! The person in their socks pacing up and own the entire flight in an attempt to avoid deep vein thrombosis. Incredibly annoying!
THE PRIMA DONNA: Airline delays are's part of flying, but like everyone travelling we all have to be somewhere eventually. Although we can all get frustrated at times, some people have trouble keeping their inner DIVA on a leash.
CARRY ON LUGGAGE: There's a reason why it's limited...........because there's only so much space going around. Leg room is for feet - not for a bag big enough to house a dead body!

And just when you think you've come across them all, you land, only to be knocked down by the 'ESCAPE ARTIST'.......the traveller who's determined to get off the plane 30 seconds before anyone else. As soon as that seat belt sign goes off - they make a mad dash for the exit.

Me, well......if I'm honest, I'm guilty of being the 'frustrated handbag digger'. 'Keys, wallet, passport'..........always digging for something and doing the double check.
That's okay, isn't it..........?

1 comment:

  1. Alex, this is SO VERY TRUE! You forgot to mention those people who constantly walk past and or over anyone sitting in the front row (bulkhead or basinet space). They feel they have a right to constantly step over bags, legs, kids and through basinets instead of walking 3 paces further down the aisle to cross the plane. Woke my 2 kids so many times and even kicked both the kids and kicked over bags while walking through.
    Love reading your pages. They are Hilarious!
    Jacq x